“I’m so tired of this timeline”

Yes, we know, the world is pretty fucked and we’re (mostly) all tired of it. Unless you’re a supporter of corrupt, warmongering, rapist paedophiles or whatever, I guess.

But why express your own honest heartfelt emotions when you can lazily bash out this terminally overused line that was born from a few too many lazy superhero movies explaining away canonical inconsistencies with “bUt ThEyRe FrOm A dIfFeReNt UnIvErSe” and has been so relentlessly overused by (I guess understandably) tired Reddit users that it might as well have not been posted at all given how effectively it melts into the background noise.

There is no other “timeline”. We’re here. Right now. Making these choices. Suffering these consequences. Own it. Be real. Express your own feelings in your own words, not someone else’s line that’s long since expired and is now mindlessly invoked by lazy karma-hounds, left to roam the gutters of every news thread on Reddit like the walking dead.

“Bold of you to assume that [e.g. Nigel Farriage supporters can read]”

It’s just a snarky way of further insulting the target of whatever previous comment or post is being replied to. Usually it’s carted out and given CPR so that it can pose as a searingly insightful and terribly amusing reply to someone making a naively optimistic comment about said group of people.

In this case it would be doled out in response to someone posting something like “What are Nigel Farriage’s supporters going to say about this well-researched investigation into what a two-faced, racist, xenophobic, corrupt, lying cunt he is”.

I imagine that the very first time someone used this it was indeed an internet sensation and earned that user many thousands of valuable Reddit Karma points. Such wit! Such snark! How true! LMFAO, rofl-copters, the whole works.

But now for many considerably less quick-witted users it’s their go-to line of snark when they don’t have anything original or constructive to add themselves but really want to put the boot in to a demographic that they don’t like, and also really want that juicy Karma boost. Yawn.

“[The voters of Plactown] have the opportunity to do the funniest thing here!”

So droll, so boring. Sticking with the example topic of our fictional chum Nigel Farriage, this is another one of those “someone said this once and it was hugely popular so now I use it whenever I’ve got nothing constructive to add but want to farm me some sweet sweet attention/Karma”.

In this case it would be employed as a response to Nigel Farriage triggering a by-election he assumes he will win, so that he can try to claim “The people of Plactown have spoken and they don’t care how corrupt and easily bribed I appear to be,” as a proxy for the user posting a more erudite comment, like “The majority of Plactown should vote for Count Bumface instead, and show Farriage exactly what they think of his obvious corruption and evident scorn for the working people of this nation.”

But normal, intelligent comments like that don’t allow the user to role-play as “I’m a funny internet dude, people think I’m hilarious”, see.